My Life ~ Incidents List

1) Infant Stomach Ailment

As an infant I develop a stomach ailment. After a period of time at the hospital I have lost weight to the point that the doctor advises my mother it is time to get the wooden box ready for me. His comments were "there was nothing left to work with" and funeral arrangements should be made. Mom takes me home from the hospital and slowly nurses me back to health.

Lesson #1: There is no greater love than the love of a mother for her child.

2) Near Drowning #1

My mother and family members visit my father's home land in the former Yugoslavia. I am four or five years old. On the way through the Alps my mother's friend almost drives over the edge of a cliff. We require assistance to get the van back on the road. We reach our destination and while there and visiting friends the friends take us for a picnic by the Adriatic sea. I manage to wander off and stumble into a nearby swimming pool. A young man at the pool sees me fall in and saves me from sure drowning as I do not know how to swim.

Lesson #2: There are angels among us that will save us if we let them.

3) Near Drowning #2

My brother and I are walking home from school, it is spring and the ice is just off the lakes and ponds in the mornings due to frost. My brother joins some other kids playing on rafts and asks me to join him on his raft. As I kneel clutching to the raft I am mindful of my previous near drowning. Despite the clutching I fall into near freezing water. I remember how incredibly cold it was, and how it got colder and colder the deeper I went. Likewise it got darker and darker until it was pitch black. Then something incredible happened. I saw this faint light in the distance, kind of like the size of a distant flashlight and I seemed to be moving closer and closer to the light. As I came closer to the light I became warmer and warmer. The light grew bigger and closer and closer until I was in the light. I remember how warm it was and how there was no sound. It is the most cozy, peaceful and serene place that I have ever been in my entire life.

Lesson #3: Do not fear death, for where we go next is an incredible place

4) The Bike Roll

I am about 12 years old, a school friend Scott and I are riding our bikes to a place we have never ridden before. At that time bike helmets were not even a thought. I am behind him and decide to try and catch up as we hit the Granit Hill, it is very steep (it has twice been leveled to reduce the grade since that time). I see this as the opportunity to catch up so I start pedaling faster and faster. I get a third of the way down I hit a rock in the middle of the road, it is a gravel roadway not paved. Suddenly I am in a high speed wobble that I cannot control. My bike flips over and over again. When I finally come to a stop my bike is a wreck, I have cuts and scrapes on virtually every part of my body except my head and a large gash on my hip. Worst part was that I was two miles from home and had to walk my broken bike home.

Lesson #4: Friends are always nearby should you fall.

5) Gas Tank Explosion

My brother is towing a car to the auto wreckers. I am about 15 years old and this new friend of my brothers who I have never met accompanies us. As we are about 3 miles from the wreckers my brother stops and tells us that he needs to do something just down the road. He leaves us behind with the towed car. After a while his friend and I get bored and step out behind the trunk of the car. His friend spots this trail of wetness and we follow it for about ten feet. He pulls out his lighter and proceeds to light the wet spot. Just like on TV the gas that had leaked from the car that was being towed lights up, and zipped under the car, there is a thunderous bang as the remaining gas in the tank explodes and propels the tank lid open and the tank top into the nearby forest. There is a flame from the residue of gas still left. Luckily there was not enough gas left in the tank to harm us.

Lesson #5: Never play with matches

6) Near Drowning #3

I am about 15 years old. My friend Doug and I and my brother Mike's friend Ken are swimming in Lake Simcoe. By now I know how to swim somewhat, though I never go where the water goes over my head, except on this day. I thought I would be okay because the buoys that outlined the swimming area would allow me to have a rest until I could swim back to where it was safe. Unfortunately as I hung onto my lifeline, Ken decided to pull it under his feet. Clutching to the line I swallowed water and went under. As I let go of the line I realized I was in trouble and would not make it back to shore. As life would have it, my friend Doug was only a few feet away and he saved me that day.

Lesson # 6: You can never have enough friends

7) First Driving Lesson and the Telephone Pole

I have turned sixteen and have my learner's permit but have never driven a car on the road. One day my brother is off to see his friends in a remote area. He suddenly announces that I should drive. This is in the winter and it takes him a while to convince me to sit behind the driver's seat. The first stretch is no problem. Unfortunately we drive past the intended driveway and need to do a "U" turn which I negotiate very carefully and back we go in the direction of the driveway. As we approach the driveway my brother says "slow down" so I hit the brakes. Unfortunately we hit an ice patch. We proceed to miss the driveway, go over an embankment and hit a telephone pole. As luck would have it the pole does not break and electrocute us. There is a dent in the bumper, the radiator is broken and a tow truck has to pull us out. I have never cried as much as I did then as I realized what I had just done to my brother's car.

Lesson # 7: It is okay to cry, although rarely are things are as bad as they may seem in that moment.

8) Car Jack Lets Go

My first car is a blessing, I am now free as a bird and can now travel away from our little town of 500 people. Unfortunately "Betsy" is a bit of an ongoing fixer upper. On this occasion the starter is not working and I have picked up a second hand starter to replace the broken one. Even though it is cold out and snowy I need to get the car fixed to go to school. I decide to do it myself. I take out the bumper jack, crank the car into the air, then place blocks under the chassis of the car. No problem, I crawl under the car with my entire body under the frame of the car and proceed to go to work. Then it happened, as I reefed on the ratchet I must have jiggled the jack and the car came off the jack with a loud bang, the next thing I knew I was pinned under the car, my nose was touching the pan of the transmission. Two tons of car was this close to my nose. At this point I realized that the only thing that had saved me from being crushed was the two cement blocks I had used as my backup.

Lesson #8: Safety first, always use backup in all you do.

9) Car Loses Tire

One day during my struggle through the dires of trying to make it through college on a shoestring budget my brother suggested that we tow one of the old beasts aka wrecks (cars) in the back forty to pick up some cash. In those days you could pick up an "easy" $45 to $50 dollars at the local auto wreckers.

So off we go my brother pulling me in his car and me in the car being towed. All is well until we hit a major curve in the road. At that point I hear a bit of a clung, but think nothing of it as we are again on a straight part of the road. We are just past Baldwin when I look out the side window only to see my rear wheel buzz by me. I remember thinking “this can't be good” as the car starts to swerve from side to side on this usually very busy roadway. From side to side I go thinking why is Alex not stopping.

There is this deafening sound as the drum of the car scrapes the pavement of the highway. Eventually I get the car under control. I get out and I am angry, "Why didn't you stop?” I ask him. He replied "There is only a chain between the two cars and I was worried you would rear end me because you were going too fast." At that point he handed me a Pepsi, and I remember looking around and seeing all these opened doors and people looking out to see what has happened. I looked at my brother and he said, "Guess I'll drive back and get the tire". I thought to myself "What must these people be thinking, two guys with a car on three wheels drinking Pepsi, hmmm..."

Lesson #9: Always make sure you have all the lug nuts on all the wheels tight (brother Al said he thought three of five would do).

10) The Van Accident

One gorgeous summer day my brother and I had to go into town to pick up some things. Town being four miles from our little village. On this occasion my big brother, who stands six feet four inches and I, who is five inches nine and half inches with the wind blowing in the right direction, are in a van my brother has borrowed from a friend. It is the kind of van that has virtually no front and your legs are positioned beside the cowl of the engine. We buy our things and start to head home. Like most towns we have a main street and ours was called High Street. We had just finished crossing the bridge for the Black River and started down High Street. I glanced up from looking at something at my feet only to see a blue van moving from its parked position at the side of the road, and yelled to Alex, "watch out". Unfortunately it was too late, by the time he hit the brakes the van was in front of us. Our van hit the other one so hard that it sent the other van half a block up the street. The front of our van was totaled and the back of the other van was crushed. No one in either vehicle was injured. The reality was that we both could have easily lost our legs in that kind of accident yet we all (both vehicles) walked away without a scratch. The driver, who was from another province, was charged by the police for a vehicle offence and we had to explain to Alfie what had happened to his van.

Lesson # 10: Accidents do happen, even when it is not your fault.

11) The Volkswagen Bus

My next youngest brother is in the armed forces. He is a career soldier with over 25 years of service. After basic training on the east coast one of his early bases was located in the mid-west. He had rented a home outside the base as he owned a dog named of all things "Puppy Dog". My brother and his girlfriend, and my girlfriend and I decided that wouldn't it be nice to surprise Mike by driving out to see him. The trip is about 1,000 miles long and was incident free, unless you call running out of gas a few miles from town, an incident. We arrived and it was a short stay as this was a long weekend whim. My army brother had just bought this brand new white truck, seeing as he was now making real money. This meant that the Volkswagen van he had driven previously was sitting idle in the driveway. Seeing as I had a piece of land I had bought for a weekend vacation spot I put two and two together. The van would serve as a great psuedo tent on the lot and then I wouldn't have to use a tent and get rained on. The good news was that the licence plates were still valid and he still had the van insured. Three hundred dollars later I was the proud owner of a Volkswagen bus.

The next part of the plan was easy. My girlfriend and I would drive the bus home and we would follow my older brother. On the way home we made one slight direction change in that we decided it would be easier on the motor of my new van to drive through the USA. Everything was going great until we hit a point in Wisconsin where we had to turn left to take another highway in a more easterly direction. I moved into the left turn lane and watched as my brother turned several cars ahead of our vehicle. Then I started to apply the brakes so I could slow down and turn. I felt a pop at the pedal and suddenly I had no brakes, nada, just like on one of those TV shows, I pumped the pedal again and again, nothing. It was time to move into evasive action as the cars turning ahead were now really close and I was sure to rear-end them at a good clip. I swerved back into the main line of traffic and concentrated on steering around the cars ahead. Fortunately there wasn't anyone in the lane beside us at that moment. Eventually we coasted to a stop with help from the hand brake. My brother who was a ways ahead had noticed that we had not made the turn and were no longer behind him, and came back to find us. He proceeded to repair the broken brake line that had failed.

Lesson #11: Always keep a spare brother around to fix mechanical problems.

12) Doing the 360

The girlfriend from the lose brakes incident is now my wife. We own a lovely home in a nice suburban neighbourhood which is about twenty miles from where I spent most of my childhood. After driving cars that I pretty much suggested, my wife finally realizes her dream of owning a Honda Accord. It was around Christmas time and Mom and Dad had come to Newmarket to join us so we could drive to see one of my brothers (or at least that's where I think we were going). Unfortunately it had been snowing all day and I volunteered to drive us as I knew my wife would be nervous in such conditions in her new car. We left our home and proceeded on our way. It kept snowing, by the time we were halfway there, snow was now so heavy that it covered the road by several inches. I was undaunted. We were driving through an urban area known as King City when I decided to change lanes. I don't know if it was a bad move or bad timing but all I remember was hitting the snow that had built up between the lanes. Next thing I know the steering wheel is pulled from my hands. The car spins into a 360 degree circle covering all four lanes of traffic. We come to a stop in the middle of the road. No other car has hit us and other than some minor heart palpitations we are all okay. I pretended as though nothing had happened as we proceeded on our way knowing that we were so blessed that on a busy roadway such as this we had not gone off the road and hit a light standard or worse, had another car hit us. Needless to say I was extra careful the rest of the way.

Lesson #12: Be wary of road conditions at all times.

13) The House Trailer

It is a long weekend and my wife and I are excited about spending it at our vacation spot. I am driving a new pickup truck that I had bought in part to tow a house trailer that my father had sold to me. Unfortunately for some unrecalled reason we were delayed in leaving for the two and a half hour drive that awaited us. This delay was a blessing for it meant that we were driving at night with very little traffic. We made our usual stop outside Peterborough for a coffee and I checked on the things packed in the back of the truck. It was now after midnight and we were about an hours drive from our destination. About ten minutes later we started down this large hill. Suddenly I could feel a jerk from the trailer pull on the truck. The trailer that was an older model and weighed a ton at the best of times started to sway the back of the pickup, which had virtually no weight to it. Before I knew it I was swerving from side to side with the trailer dictating what was going on. I knew that if I hit the brakes we would jackknife the trailer and given that we were gaining speed going down the hill, that would not be a good idea. So I just tried to keep the truck and van on the paved highway knowing that if I hit the gravel at the side of the road we would no doubt flip the whole kit and kabuttle. Eventually I got to the bottom of the hill and was able to control the car and truck and pull over. Just then a chap in a pickup truck that was going the other way, pulls along side rolls down the window and says "Great driving, I thought you had lost it, man, you could see the sparks flying for miles." As it turns out the wheel had come off the house trailer which had caused it to swerve from side to side. We spent that night sleeping next to the road with tractor trailers shaking the trailer every time one of them went passed. In the morning I went to find the tire. I never did find it. Bought another one in the nearest town and spent all day trying to find a way to install it on a trailer that was on a gravel shoulder and on one wheel.

Lesson #13: Sometimes driver's education pays off more than you think.

14) The Banking Machine

If there is one incident that most people like me to tell them about it is this one. Life at this point is great. We have just finished building our first new house. The one with the raised ceiling in the living room with a view of the back forty. My manufacturing business is doing great, ultimately it would fail due to a recession however at this time it was booming. My parents were expecting the birth of their first grandchild on this day and it would be my first niece from our family. Life was good. It was a warm August 10th day and I was going to the bank as we were to visit the newborn of my youngest brother Steve and his wife Debbie. Life was good. As I am standing in front of the machine I am aware of the sun on my neck and I think wow life is great. I hear the whirring of the machine as it is about to spit out the money. Then I hear a kind of faint voice in the background yelling "Watch out". The next thing I know I am coming in and out of consciousness. Someone is putting something in my hand and saying "here's your money and your bankcard".

In the ambulance I clear my head and hear the attendant say "Gosh are you ever lucky." It turns out that a woman with a child in her car was pulling into a spot behind the banking machine. As she pulled in she hit the gas instead of the brake, jumped the curbing, drove across the sidewalk and punched me into the bank machine. The bumper of the car hit me propelling me into the machine. My knees were driven into the metal of the machine and my head hit the top of the machine. The force was so great that I left dents in the machine where my head and knees hit. I also remember that while laying on the ground waiting for the ambulance to arrive that someone from the bank came out and said to someone beside him "Guess we are going to have to call Toronto and have the machine fixed" and left without seeing how I was. Fortunately by then other people had gathered around me to see how I was doing

Lesson #14: This event gave me several gifts and lessons, including human kindness is incredible, the woman who stayed with me until the ambulance arrived was an angel, the man who handed me my money and bank card could have run off with it but instead chose to make sure that I would be okay showed an integrity that still rests with me today. Birth and death happen each and every day. On the day that Samantha was born could have been the day that I could have died. Life is a treasure to be lived day by day and never to be taken for granted.

15) The Town Employee

It is early in the morning. I am on my way to my plant. Life has been tough as my business is not doing all that well and I am separated from my first wife. I am driving an older Monte Carlo that I had bought new but sold to my dad when I had bought my pickup truck. Dad had sold it back to me for use as a second vehicle along the way and thank goodness he had. I am stopped at a traffic light at the bottom of one of the hills in the city I am now living in. The light changes to green but before I even hit the gas pedal I am shot forward through the intersection. Fortunately I am wearing a seat belt, pull the car over and get out. Behind me is a smaller car with the front end totally smashed in. The female occupant gets out and tells me that she was looking down and talking on her CB and did not even have time to hit the brakes on her car. She was very apologetic and sincerely concerned that I was okay. She had hit my car doing 30 miles an hour. We both looked at the back of my car and you could hardly tell that it had been in an accident. Thank you GM. Though I felt fine initially, as the day wore on I began to develop severe back pains. It took me weeks to recover from the accident and as the Province had just instituted a new no fault insurance program I was not able to gain any financial recovery for my time off.

Lesson #15: Accidents do happen and sometimes good people cause them.

16) The Tractor Trailer

Nine years later and I have not had any incidents. In fact I have left the province for six of those but have now returned to take care of my aging parents. On this day another blessed event has taken place. My wife's sister who is significantly younger than we are is having her first child, a son. She lives about a two hour drive from where we do and my wife is with her at the hospital that day. As soon as the baby arrives I leave work and drive along the busy multi-lane highway that leads to Belleville. I am definitely in a hurry as I believe that visiting hours end at six in the maternity area. At some point I end up behind a tractor trailer in the right lane. I am anxious to pass but the traffic in the passing lane prevents me from doing so. Eventually the traffic clears and I proceed to pass the truck. I am about half way up the side of the trailer when I notice that the truck is moving into my lane. I lay on the horn but to no avail the truck is still continuing to come into my lane and I am being forced into the gravel shoulder. I look at the speedometer and I am doing 120 kilometers per hour.

Having witnessed my cousin roll his car in front of me when he hit the gravel shoulder when we were teenagers I knew what could happen here. I brace myself for the move onto the shoulder, all the while sounding my horn and hoping the truck will move back onto the other lane to no avail. Now I have all four wheels on the gravel shoulder, I am aware that if I slam on the brakes I will go into a high speed wobble like the time on the bike or with the house trailer so I make a bold move. I speed up and am doing 80 miles an hour to try and pass the truck, knowing that at some point I will have to drive onto the pavement to transition back onto the road. It is a scary and harrowing time but eventually I negotiate it successfully with skill and experience gained from all those other incidents.

Lesson #16: Training, experience and tuition matters most when you need it most.

So here is my message to you.

We all have been given incredible lives no matter who we are. Life is a gift that must be treasured. Life is fleeting and you never know when the next accident can occur, so live life every day like it is your last; laugh a lot, cry a lot, hug a lot, kiss a lot, and say I love you a lot. Know that your life is a living legacy, one that you create day by day. Use your legacy to inspire others to be the best that they can be every day. Know that you are incredible being of light and that you are loved, even when it does not feel like it to you. Know that life is special and so are you. Know that God loves you and that no matter what you do, or how tough life gets that you will be okay.

Know that when you move to the other side that you will be okay. That it is warm and cozy there and that the ultimate peace that you desire is waiting for you, just don't leave here until your mission is complete.